To hear about this news is something we (sort of) expected to happen sooner or later when we found out that his relatives and my step siblings took him away from us without letting us know beforehand.
I believe we took care of him really well and if they didn’t take him away from us, he would still be alive and most importantly, well, to do all the things he wanted (good or bad).
What really bothers me is the article at Inquirer newspaper that came out the day after he was buried. Well, the history of how his career came to be was correct, but the way how he died was wrong.
- He didn’t faint at a grocery the first time;
- He didn’t die of cardiac arrest.
He fainted at a bakery at this year’s mothers day. It was the last time we’ve (his second family) seen my dad in a healthy state. At the time he only had Diabetes and Kidney Failure as his primary illnesses. There are other diseases he had but I can’t mention it here, but it was definitely not Pneumonia which I believe was the reason why he died. It was an illness at the time that was left untreated that put him in that situation when he died.
He had Dialysis sessions, took his meds the right time and day before. He could walk; talk to people; remember things, facts, people, and money he should charge people for who he hasn’t charged yet. 😂
Anyway, he died because of Cardiac Arrest? When it was his last few moments at the hospital, my step siblings were in a hurry to end his life by calling a priest soon as he was brought to the ER from his house. Why were they in a hurry to cut his life? Was everything planned in the beginning?
My mom felt his pulse on his wrist and it was still beating hard. He had this face, as told me by my mom, that was still holding on to his life, wishing he’d see all of us.
And then my step sister made a gesture that it had to end. And then my mom heard my step siblings whispering that we need to end this NOW.
Lastly, at that day (December 2, 2017), he had his Dialysis session and everything went well during the afternoon. I suppose the nurses did check his heart rate if it beated normally and I suppose it did because the next four hours of Dialysis happened normally. He, according to the caregiver, ate normally, and drank normally during that time.
It was at his home where that trouble happened. The caregivers and the housemaid said that they gave him his food; fed him the food, and “suddenly” he drank something and made him vomit. His caregiver said that it was from a can of Nephro. I doubt that was the drink that caused him that, because I drink it often, too. Anyway, after vomiting, and as they said to my mom, he had a seizure, he was rushed to the hospital.
Everything was rushed once he was there. They called us here at home, my mom, my brother, everyone else. I was left here alone with my cousin since they were worried I might be next if I was there to hear such news and witness it personally. *awkward giggle*
Whenever we try to talk to the caregivers, they become silent and comes running to my step brother as if to defend himself and herself from us who wants to corner them up for what has happened. Isn’t it their responsibility to take care of their patient??
The guy caregiver said to my mom a couple of months before, that he had another patient before who died because, probably, of his irresponsibility. He was angry that he didn’t get his salary from the family. If he did, he said, the family would have sued him. Obviously, he isn’t doing his job properly because, fucking look what happened, he killed his patient yet again. So why isn’t dad’s relatives and step siblings suing him?
Sorry to say but the first and last part of that Inquirer article are all lies.
We really do not care much about who takes over his business. When he was still alive, and one of us had interest in just helping he wasn’t interested about the idea and made us go do our own thing. We just wanted to help with the paperwork, not even design the furnitures. Help out with the deliveries, paperwork, like helping out in the yard kind of thing.
Obviously, my step siblings want to take over his business so much, they can go have all of it. 😊 Lastly, I believe all of them in that house are suspects to my dad being dead. The caregivers, those housemaids, one of his relatives, and my step siblings. 😊
My brother works in a different company now, completely different from what our dad did. Not about furnitures, antiquities, wood restoration, or asian wood. I myself want to work on my own, on my own terms, on a different league too.
What we care about is that letting people know about the whole thing that happened before and during the time that his sickness took over. His pre and post state of his sickness, according to that paper, is wrong.
And also me, grieving over his death, here in my blog. I feel so bad that I didn’t get to see him recently, not even in this month. It’s not that I owe him an apology but just that I didn’t get to see him even in the last time. Lastly, it was just 3 days before his birthday that he passed away and again, that makes me more sad than the other reasons I said here. When it is your time, or not, death doesn’t choose a date for you, it chooses on its own.
It is just too bad that now he’s dead, his family and my step siblings think this is a good idea to tie each other’s loose ends. Why couldn’t they do this when he was still alive? Why do it now when it seems to have no purpose anymore?
Also, when he was alive, he helped too many, many people. So many people that he barely had time to completely finance his own daughter for (me) her Kidney transplant. He was able to finance someone’s mother from being a stroke patient to be able to normally walk, talk, stand, etc. again.
Now, at the time when he was weak and close to dying. In the last 6 months, people were rarely there to pay their compliments. At the house he stayed at (where my dad’s relatives and step siblings stayed), most of his true friends came, said their good words, cried, and left sad because of the situation and what has happened to their friend.
I went to visit him with my mom and cousin a couple of times at his Dialysis center but he (we thought) doesn’t seem to know who we are, maybe. Since that is the case, we stopped visiting. It was on September 9, 2017 that I visited him last. I was tearing up while saying “tatay, birthday ko na bukas, batiin mo naman ako..” but he was just murmuring. Don’t know if he knows me, or what, but I didn’t get any greeting. On the other hand, I said that my cousin is there, ready to massage his feet, or make him coffee, and he said, “gawan mo ko yung last time”. I guess that’ll be the last I’ll hear from him, then. I wanted to visit him on the afternoon which, turns out, would have been his last day. I blame my mom for not letting us visit. Tsk. 😂
To my dad’s relatives and some workers, t’was like they were still just there just to ask money from him, like the “good old days”. Literally when he woke up in the morning, people would come to our house (when he stayed here) with their hand doing that gesture that they needed money from him. Those assholes don’t have the decency to use their own salary and ask for the money back some time later since he already does most of the work that they should work on (free food, shelter, water, etc.).
Some of my favorite things related to my dad:
This was along the area where we went to check out the shop where his client is located
These are the bread that he loves so much. Surely he has bought a couple before he fainted. 😞 On the other hand, I am glad I took a photo of this.
Some of the eye glasses that he wore when he was on his early years
Around the time that he got featured in a newspaper (same, Inquirer again). Too bad I didn’t get a copy of this paper, though!
He would have stayed with us on this hotel (where I took this from, at Holiday Inn, not from Shangri-la) but he was elsewhere
Those chair and woodworks? It’s one of those many, other items that he left behind and people would remember him for these
I believe I have now moved on and slowly getting over it. Writing about this now, a week later, has also helped me get over the situation.
During the week that he passed away, I tear up whenever we went to his wake especially to see him at his coffin. 😥 Now, whenever people here at home talk about it, I just laugh it off. Even if they make jokes that he’ll haunt us here. It’s okay, I never saw him.. so that’ll be a party if he does show up as a ghost. Kidding.