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Breathe

December 20, 2008 by Anna β€” 18 Comments
Filed Under: Musings

They’re singing deck the halls
But it’s not like Christmas at all
I remember when you were here
All the fun we had last year
Christmas (Baby Please Come Home) – Deathcab For Cutie

Does this signal a sad Christmas for me? XD I don’t know, I’m not sure.. but I think this pretty much fits my ‘mood’ for the holidays.

PS: I’m not waiting for anyone to “come home”. πŸ˜›

Looking at my previous entry, I didn’t really make my December progressive in terms of “archiving” what happened. Hahah, my last update was December 8 and my recent is December 20.. wow a BIG leap indeed. Do I owe anyone 10 hours of story-telling of what happened to me in the past few weeks? *hesitant* Yes. But I know most people have Plurk accounts up to this time, so just add me and you will be updated 24/7, lol. πŸ˜‰ I don’t add back people I have never heard of.. maybe I should put my account on Public now, so that I’ll have fans or something. Or not. :))

Christmas break started yesterday for me. Last day of the term was yesterday and I stayed till afternoon waiting for my friends to get their course cards for their NSTP subject so I got to hangout with them for a little while. I’m content with my grades.. yet there were times I thought that the marks I got were unfair (on SOME subjects).. on the bright side, NO SUBJECTS TO REPEAT! Read on..

<spoiler ‘Life is really unfair, or maybe I have the 2nd term jinx’ ‘Life goes on’>
Honestly, from the start I thought I was going to fail 1 subject.. but eventually realizing after getting my other plates from other “manual art rendering” subjects, thought I would fail 4 (out of 7 subjects I am taking this term).. but thank God I got passing marks! Prayers do work, zomg. πŸ™‚ Mhmm.. My grades are far too embarrassing to post here so I’ll leave it at that. There were times that I thought my grade in this one subject was really unfair.. not to brag but I think my final project was better than the others. Oh well, I suppose that.. the weekly plates we did really makes an impact on the final grading. I felt like a loser anticipating a 3.0 but I got a .5 grade lower than that. πŸ™ The professor tried to make me feel good by saying my final project ranked #3 on the class, but I didn’t feel any encouragement on my part. And he said that grades are just fancy decorations.. WRONG. It’s different from a student’s perspective. These “grades” could make our lives better, could give us this happy feeling inside of us, could make us DLs and makes us proud of ourselves. And when I told my mom about it she told me, I easily give up.. well, yeah, sort of. Sure, s’long as I’m still alive there’s still hope.. but man, I’m always unappreciated in my “field”. I’ve always just shrugged off the feeling. 😐

I accept the grades I got on these subjects because I know I deserve them, though I was surprised that I got a 2.5 for my Color rendering class.. teehee. Especially on Computer Graphics.. I’m effin glad I’m over that subject..

Well, yeah I really do feel I’m always, somehow jinxed every 2nd term of the year.. I’ll get to prove it next year when I’m in third year, lol. I guess that’s just life.. you get the sucky profs.. or paswertehan nalang sa profs. Some may call this kind of experience a challenge, to come out of their comfort zone and face challenges because when they graduate, they WILL come across people like them in the business industry. I’m not ready for that.. I just wanna graduate and BUM! KIDDING! Gee, I sound like a happy-go-lucky person don’t I? XD I’m not, promise. πŸ˜›

Not much productivity happening on my Christmas break.. I’ve read a book, downloaded movies (but haven’t watched them), been PLURKING (I’m trying to resist, promise), ate less.. Slept alot. What I lacked in the previous term was SLEEP and I plan to taking it back, lol, seriously! Right now I’m brainstorming for a new layout.. I want a big layout for this site, this is too small. πŸ˜› And not to mention, really old. HAHA.

Suddenly I feel like the Grinch. I haven’t been to any Christmas parties, the family is not in the “mood” for the holiday, I haven’t been in the mood myself (though at the start of the month I was all “Yay it’s December, Christmas and breaks!! WHEEEE~!” mood), I haven’t bought much presents and gave any to my friends (I only gave one gift to a friend recently).. The air may be cold but the Christmas spirit is really not around me. :)) My mom will leave for Bohol tomorrow to take care of some things regarding my grandma (her mother).. she’ll be back on the 24th. IDK, that’s kinda sad.. she won’t be around before Christmas.. but I hope she gets here in the morning, so it’ll be fun! But I understand, ok ok.. It’s the only time she’ll get to spend the holidays with her/them. So yeah.

I hope my next update will be eventful, hahaha. Hope everyone’s Christmas will be fun and well-spent. I want to eat lots of food.. but hmm.. the cooking sucks here lately. :hmph: And I’m sick of eating fastfoods. I think my Kidney’s starting to get worse with my Fastfood frenzy.

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Filed under: Musings

About the author: Anna

Internet lurker since the early 2000s. Blogger of So Stellar, an anything goes blog. Web designer @ AnnaEsguerra.com. Previously a concert addict who loved covering events for this blog. Currently on break as I'm focusing on health and recovery.. (More about Anna)

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18 Responses

  1. Keng says

    December 25, 2008 at 6:23 PM

    I know what you mean with the “it’s not like Christmas…” line in the DCFC song you quoted. And I don’t understand why–it just doesn’t feel at all like Christmas/the holidays for me. Maybe the whole the-US-is-officially-in-a-recession has something to do with it, haha, but even then… ❓

    Anyways. Haha, parati naman tayong nasa Plurk, pero merry Christmas Anna! πŸ˜€

    Reply
  2. vanessa says

    December 24, 2008 at 5:16 PM

    i have a new site..please relink. ;]
    i’ve been a grinch too. ugh.. i hope i get better before midnight though..

    merry christmas! ;D

    Reply
  3. Ivy says

    December 24, 2008 at 7:43 AM

    haha.. ive been also pulling off a grinch lately so i pretty know how you feel.

    Reply
  4. Sakura says

    December 23, 2008 at 10:14 PM

    Thanks!

    I haven’t been to any christmas parties too. I wonder how is it like…

    Reply
  5. Aisha says

    December 23, 2008 at 1:15 PM

    dun think. feel it. celebrate it.

    merry christmas

    Reply
  6. Mariel says

    December 23, 2008 at 9:31 AM

    “Prayers do work”
    Yes very right i’ve experienced this one this year only and yes i think i will failed all the test but happily not :)) ohh btw congratz that you’ve passed at least. I think that was unfair not giving the right grade for your work i hate it when teachers do that.Grade is important.Meryy christmas ate anna ! God bless you

    Reply
  7. Mary says

    December 22, 2008 at 11:59 PM

    OH gosh, Anna. I feel the SAME way. Hahaha. I don’t even feel like it’s Christmas. There’s really nothing special about it 😐

    At least YOU’RE being productive. Haha. All I do is laze around and sit on front of the computer πŸ˜›

    Reply
  8. Isai says

    December 22, 2008 at 7:33 PM

    Congratulations on passing on all your subjects. :yay:

    Don’t believe in any jinxes! Once you do, there’s no stopping it. Haha. Well I think jinxes ain’t true. Pana-panahon lang talaga? Or maybe you have to try harder. πŸ™‚

    In college talaga grades aren’t fancy decorations na… sadly. πŸ™ They’re like, our key to our CAREER! :))

    I hope Christmas day turns out well for you. πŸ™‚ Enjoy it. If the Christmas spirit isn’t around you, then make it be. πŸ™‚

    Merry Christmas Anna!

    Reply
  9. Mia says

    December 22, 2008 at 12:37 AM

    Hey Anna! I’ve been reading your entries, but I haven’t really commented on any of it haha! Anyways, ehh, I’m not really into the Christmas spirit either.. at least, not yet πŸ˜€ But the other day, I was really into the spirit. It just somehow died. Sad to hear that your mom’s not gonna be around before Christmas, but hey, she’s gonna be home by Christmas Eve, yay! Like you, I will definitely take advantage of getting more sleep πŸ˜€ Oh and I don’t want to eat a lot of food this break, but I think I’m gonna end up eating a lot hahaha! Anyways, have a merry Christmas!

    Reply
  10. Jacque says

    December 21, 2008 at 5:57 PM

    good to hear you’re contented with your grades. hope you’ll be better next term πŸ™‚ my family isn’t in the mood to celebrate Christmas and I hate it. 😐 gaah. anyway. advance merry Christmas Ate Anne. :yay:

    Reply
  11. Joyce says

    December 21, 2008 at 2:41 PM

    congrats anna for passing 2nd term! :yay:

    yeah, i guess, paswertihan na lang talaga sa profs. some profs doesn’t even teach and they give you high grades nga eh. and i can tell that you’ve been working hard on your subjects so you really deserve good grades. screw that prof who says grades aren’t everything. yeah, it’s not everything, but it’s important. specially on your transcript…and most specially if you deserve a better grade right?

    maybe you should go out on malls and stuff so you could really feel Christmas. I do that. even though i don’t have money. hahahaha! try that, it might work. πŸ™‚

    Christmas is still 4 days away, you still have time to feel the happy stuff that goes along with it!

    Reply
  12. Gel says

    December 21, 2008 at 11:07 AM

    Maybe one of the reasons why i’m extra excited about Christmas is coz of Nino’s birthday but other than that.. I really don’t know. Heh. So sorry about your mom not being around before Christmas though. I hate it when our moms are obligated to do special errands and stuff :s

    I hate it when profs tell me that grades aren’t everything.. I know that, but for some reason as students we feel that it’s what DEFINES us as students, you know? Tsk.

    Good luck next term! LOTS OF SCHOOLWORK FOR ME over the break. Drat. Hello, semestral schooling. Haha.

    Reply
  13. Sweetie&Bunny says

    December 21, 2008 at 10:17 AM

    yeys for christmas break!! :heart: lots to do this christmas break? i dont…happy holidays! :yay:

    Reply
  14. Erika says

    December 21, 2008 at 12:15 AM

    quote: And he said that grades are just fancy decorations.. WRONG. It’s different from a student’s perspective.

    ^ i super duper agree with this. people may say that grades are just that but really they’re there for a reason talaga eh. and well, 2nd sems suck for me, too (not that it’s already done). guess we just have to do better! πŸ˜›

    plus i really think art-related subjects are one of the hardest so congrats anna for passing all your subjects, really. i really admire your talent and sooner or later more people are gonna see that. πŸ™‚

    about christmas, it’s my favorite holiday but i’ve been heartbroken by it for some times already so this season, i just won’t expect for anything. πŸ˜›

    Reply
  15. Lissie says

    December 20, 2008 at 10:19 PM

    Congrats sa good grades. πŸ˜€ I have a lot of failing grades kasi, geez.
    Merry Christmas. πŸ™‚

    PS. Kindly change my link sis. Hehe. I already Linked ya. πŸ˜€

    Reply
  16. chester says

    December 20, 2008 at 8:56 PM

    :yay: congrats pa rin teh anna. can do better next time. merry xmas!

    Reply
  17. Christian says

    December 20, 2008 at 2:58 PM

    Hi there Anna! It’s been a while since I last visited your blog! Congratulations for finishing your second term and passing all of your subject.

    Yes! Yes! Paswertihan lang talaga sa mga profs especially in my case, since block sections kami. We’re not the ones who choose our sched and prof. Nakagawa na lahat, gagawin mo lang ay mag-enrol, tapos comes the first day of classes, bigla na lang papasok instructor and dun mo lang malalaman kung sino ang prof mo. Malas ka kapag boring/terror ang instructor.

    Hopefully, by the eve of Christmas, you’ll not feel like Grinch.

    PS: I dig that song of DCFC!

    Reply
  18. cars says

    December 20, 2008 at 2:56 PM

    Holy emo Anna! Hahaha. Kidding. πŸ™‚

    I was the same back in high school. Laging may pattern na yung second quarter paling yung grades. πŸ™‚ Buti you’re not gonna repeat anything and undergo the same tortures again. HAHAHA. You still earn a congratulations for that. πŸ˜€

    I’m feeling the Christmas spirit naoo. I dunno why, it’s just a warm fuzzy feeling. LOL. So cheesy. Hope you get that warm fuzzy feeling too despite the cold. O_O

    SLEEP EARLY! haha

    Reply


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